So I just watched a stream by Chapter Master @Valrak , and while I don't agree on everything he said regarding cap point mode or escorts, I think there is one way to fix it for now (at least until we get lobbies, that is): Don't let them cap.
It's just that simple. Let them decap as they will, a defensive or much slower fleet will just go and cap three points and set itself up between them, ready to attack anyone who tries to fully cap them. The defensive fleet will still need escorts to scout who is capping, otherwise they will probably go for the wrong cap where there is only an escort decapping, while the rest of the enemy fleet goes for another point.
And in case of huge losses on both sides, with one only having a few or even a single escort left, and the other a cruiser for example...well, cap the enemy points and just sit there. The escorts will have to try to take you down, as they can't cap themselves. This forces an engagement, which is far better than losing to smaller ships simply outrunning you all the time.